


Of Men and Monsters

by redlipstickblackdress



Series: Men and Monsters [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Incredible Hulk - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Phil Coulson, Bruce Banner & Tony Stark Friendship, Bruce Feels, Bruce gets laid, Clint gets laid, F/M, Family Feels, Languages and Linguistics, Loki Feels, Loki gets laid, Loki pretends to be someone else, Nick Fury is so done, Oblivious Steve Rogers, Romance, Science Bros, Tesseract, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro, Wingwoman Pepper Potts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-08
Updated: 2013-12-08
Packaged: 2018-01-04 00:48:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 33
Words: 14,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1075084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redlipstickblackdress/pseuds/redlipstickblackdress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A female terrorist is locked up with Loki in his cell on the S.H.I.E.L.D. helicarrier, and sparks fly, causing some changes in Loki's plans.  Meanwhile, Bruce Banner falls for a translator he is working with, but she freaks out when she meets "the other guy."  How will he convince her that he's got the Hulk under control?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In which Loki gets a cellmate

Lydia Sorenson walked down the corridor with her wrists chained together in handcuffs; two guards walked in front of her, two behind her with their hands on her shoulders. Soon, she was tossed into a big glass cylinder where she was to be imprisoned. 

The other occupant of this cell turned and enjoyed what he saw. The female terrorist was wearing tight black leather pants and boots. Her ample chest was covered in a red leather corset top tied with black string and her red hair flared out in layers around her face. He smiled a wicked smile and turned to Nick Fury, who was in the room where this glass compartment was contained.

"What is this? A gift? A plaything?" The tall, thin man asked the director of S.H.I.E.L.D. 

"You're not bad, but I could do better," Lydia retorted, eyeing her cellmate. 

"Enough," Fury said. "With any luck, the two of you will kill each other and save me the trouble." He explained their situation to the new prisoner, assuring her that any hope of escape was futile, before leaving his two captives alone together. 

"What are you in for?" Lydia asked. 

"Are you alarmed?" 

"No."

"You should be. Haven't you heard? I'm the most feared man in the world," he said, slowly walking closer until his face was a few inches from hers. She didn't back away or even so much as flinch. 

"The most feared man...you must almost be as dangerous as the most feared woman," she replied, looking right into his green eyes. He laughed chillingly and walked to the other side of the glass cell. 

"I think I'm going to enjoy this," he said, smiling at her.


	2. In which Bruce is flustered

Bruce was in his lab looking at data on one of the state-of-the-art computer screens he regularly worked with. He had left the door open, but he didn’t hear anyone enter until he heard a soft voice say, 

“Dr. Banner?” 

“Yeah?” he answered, turning to see the source of the voice, which happened to be a beautiful woman with softly curled shoulder-length brown hair wearing a vintage khaki dress. “Yeah…that’s me,” he added, realizing he had been staring with his mouth open. “You can call me Bruce.” 

“I’m Nelle Carmichael, from the linguistics division. You requested someone specializing in French?” 

“Yes…right,” he said, removing his glasses and pulling a couple of chairs up to a table. He offered her one and then grabbed a big book and a large stack of papers, then went to sit next to her. “I’ve been working on some research and looking into recreating and examining the work of Bernard Chastain. He’s a French physicist who specialized in gamma radiation. The problem is that all of his papers are in French.” 

“So you need a translator. Well, I won’t have a clue what any of it means, but I can certainly translate them for you. Was there a particular time you’d like to get started?”

“Any time is fine, whatever’s convenient for you.” 

“How about tomorrow morning?” 

“That’s great.” 

“Can I take these with me? Tonight I can look a few of them over and make sure there aren’t any words I need to look up and get an idea for what I’m working on.” 

“Sure.” 

“Alright. I’ll see you here at nine, if that works.” With that, she gathered up a few of the papers and left Bruce in the lab, trying to remember how to talk to a pretty woman.


	3. In which Loki gets to know his roommate

Lydia was flipping through the car magazine that Fury had given her when she said she was bored, enjoying the shiny automobiles and reading about their engines. 

“So, who are you anyway?” she asked her companion in a bored voice as she stared at the vehicles on the glossy pages. 

“I am Loki of Asgard,” he said, straightening up with a smile. 

“Ass-gard?” Lydia asked, chuckling. Loki raised his eyebrows at her. “Am I supposed to be impressed by that? Well, I guess you must have done something badass or you wouldn’t be in here with me.” 

“I’m sure you heard about the incident in Stuttgart?” 

“No…I don’t watch the news, I make the news.”

“I see. What did you do, then, that is so extraordinary?” Loki asked snarkily. 

“I threatened the world with a virus that only I know how to activate,” she said. He looked mildly impressed. “I’m Lydia, by the way. So, what did you do in Stuttgart?” 

He explained about how he’d gone to Stuttgart so that he could get a stabilizer for the Tesseract and then tried to rule the world. 

“Alright, that’s kind of cool, I’ll give you that,” Lydia admitted. Loki just laughed. 

“I do not wish to impress you, mortal.” 

“Mortal…oooh, good insult,” she said sarcastically. Loki suddenly slammed his fist against the glass and turned to her, speaking in a low hiss. 

“You may not be afraid of me now, but I assure you that should I desire it, I could kill you slowly and painfully, you mewling quim.” 

“That’s a much better insult,” Lydia said with a smirk. Loki took a deep breath and a smile spread over his face. “Calm down, Leather Pants. If I were a threat to you, you’d already be on the floor.” 

“Shall I point out that you, too, are wearing pants of leather?” he said. 

“They look good on me,” Lydia said, her eyes dancing. 

“We agree, then,” Loki said, his eyes also beginning to sparkle. 

“Are you flirting with me?” 

“Is it working?” 

“Please. You’re not so hot,” Lydia said, although the look on her face said otherwise. Suddenly, she glanced past Loki to where Clint Barton was wandering around the room. “Him, on the other hand…” Loki turned to see what she was staring at and raised an eyebrow at her. She walked up to the glass and smiled at Clint. “Hi.” 

“Uh…hey. Do you need anything?” Clint answered. 

“No, I’m just bored. Hey, do you lift weights? You look really strong,” she said. She thought she heard Loki snort behind her. Clint couldn’t help but smile and his chest puffed up a bit. He wasn’t used to getting this kind of attention. The two chatted for a while, Lydia flirting, until Clint was called away and she went right back to her magazine.


	4. In which Bruce talks to a pretty girl

The next morning, Nelle went back to Bruce’s lab. She found him with his glasses already donned, the top button of his blue shirt undone. Nelle entered with a stack of papers under one arm and a coffee cup in each hand. 

“Good morning. I brought coffee. I don’t know how you like it, but you seemed like a black coffee guy. If not, you can have my caramel cinnamon latte,” she offered. 

“Black coffee is great,” Bruce said. “Thank you. You didn’t have to do that, it’s very thoughtful.” 

“It’s partially for your own good that I brought caffeine. I’m a little terrifying in the morning.” 

“I highly doubt that,” he said. Nelle smiled and took a sip of her latte before flipping through some of the pages Bruce had given her. 

“So, I looked over these last night and typed up a few pages. I’m sorry there’s not more right now; there’s a lot to go through.” 

“No, this is a great start. I’m sure you’re very busy.” 

“Not really. I’m actually sort of glad to have something to do. If you want, I can go grab some reference books and come back and work on some more of these. That way, you can grab them from me as soon as I’m done with them so I’m not holding up your work.” 

“If you don’t have anything else to do, that would be really helpful.” 

“Great! I’ll be right back,” she said. A few minutes later, she returned with a laptop and two books in her hands: a French/English dictionary in case she needed to look up a particularly obscure word and a physics book for reference. She grabbed a page and started typing the translation while Bruce compared what she had already translated to his own work. 

While they worked, they occasionally chatted and got to know each other. Bruce decided that there was no need to bring up the Other Guy, choosing instead to focus on his childhood and his work. He also learned about Nelle, that she liked to read and ice skate, and that she had a passion for words, as could be assumed from her job. However, it definitely was more than a job to her – she had a love for her work that he found incredibly charming. After a few hours, they decided to call it a day agreeing to continue the following day.


	5. In which Clint is kind of into it

The next time Clint was in the room where Lydia and Loki were imprisoned, Lydia jumped at the chance to talk to him again. 

“Hey,” Lydia said. “I always wanted to learn how to use a bow and arrow. You’re so good at it.” 

“Well, if you hadn’t threatened the entire world and gotten locked up, I could have taught you,” Clint said with a smirk. 

“Maybe I’ll change my ways and get out of here, and then you can,” she said. 

“If that ever happens, you know where to find me, Sorenson,” Clint said, shaking his head in disbelief and leaving the room. A few minutes later, Steve Rogers entered in his Captain America uniform. 

“Hell-lo, Star Spangled Tight Pants,” she said, eyeballing the super soldier. “I’d like to get my hands on those buns of steel.” The captain just raised an eyebrow and looked completely taken aback, his cheeks turning slightly pink. 

“Ma’am, we don’t know each other very well, and that’s not exactly my style,” he said, then turned to leave the room. 

“Is he gay or something?” Lydia asked Loki when the captain was gone. Loki just shrugged, not really caring. A couple hours later, Agent Coulson came to check in on them. 

“I see that you two haven’t yet managed to engage in an epic fight that leads to you plummeting to your death,” Coulson said. 

“I’m a lover, not a fighter,” Lydia said with a smile. “Do you want me to prove it?” 

“Nice try,” Coulson said, leaving the room. 

“Must you attempt to seduce every man you see?” Loki asked. 

“Why, are you jealous?” 

“Don’t be a fool. I simply find it tedious to watch you throw yourself at every male who happens to enter this room.” 

“Yeah, well we’ll see how tedious you think it is when one of them lets me out.” Loki just laughed at this. “You’re just jealous that you didn’t think of it first.” 

“My purpose is too grand for such petty manipulation,” Loki said. 

“Well, you’re not going to get laid with that attitude,” Lydia said, turning to see Clint entering the room again and putting on her most winning smile.


	6. In which Tony has no tact

When Nelle went to Bruce’s lab the next day, she not only had a coffee for each of them but a bag of pastries as well. 

“Do you always bring your coworkers breakfast?” Bruce asked. 

“I don’t usually work with anyone,” Nelle admitted. They got to work, munching and sipping their coffee. About mid-morning, someone came into the lab. 

“Found anything good?” the guy asked Bruce, then noticed Nelle sitting at a table. “Who’s Polly Pocket over there?” 

“Tony, this is Nelle Carmichael, she’s from the linguistics division. She’s helping me translate Chastain’s work.” 

“Right on. Does your enormous crush on her get in the way of working together, or do you just ignore it and try to focus?” he asked. Bruce’s face and ears glowed bright pink and he hastily tried to change the subject. 

“Professor Carmichael’s skill was very helpful to me yesterday,” he said. 

“Oh, you can call me Nelle,” she said, smiling and blushing from the crush comment. 

“Yeah, Bruce, call her Nelle.”

“Tony didn’t you have that thing you were going to do this morning?” 

“Already did it,” he said, much to Bruce’s dismay. Tony then turned to Nelle. “Tony Stark: genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist,” he introduced. “So, French, huh? Why is it called French kissing?” 

“I…don’t know.” 

“Maybe when you’re done with this you two should research that,” he said, gesturing to them both and causing them both to blush brightly. 

“Tony, we’ve got a lot of work to do here…” Bruce said pointedly, completely mortified. 

“Got it. I’m going to go check out Silver Tongue’s new roomie; I heard she’s hot.” With that, he left the lab. Bruce turned awkwardly to Nelle, utterly embarrassed. 

“Sorry about him…” 

“No, he seems nice,” she said. They got back to work, and although Nelle didn’t act like it, she definitely remembered what Tony had said.


	7. In which Tony gets a boner

When Tony Stark entered the room, Lydia immediately walked up to the glass and looked him over. 

“Wow. Robin Hood was right about you.” 

“What did he say?” 

“That you have the body of a porn star. I’m paraphrasing.” 

“Well, aren’t you sweet. What’s that on your chest?” 

“It’s called an arc reactor. There’s some shrapnel in my body that’s trying to get to my heart. This glowy metal circle keeps me alive.” 

“I’d like to get a better look at it…without the shirt,” she said with a wink. At that moment, Fury came in. 

“Can I borrow her?” he asked Fury. 

“Mr. Stark, my patience is dwindling,” was Fury’s response. 

“Oh, come on. Please, Eye Patch? He can even keep me all tied up,” Lydia said, causing Tony’s eyes to widen. 

“You know, you are really starting to get on my nerves,” Fury said to Lydia. She held her hands up in surrender and shrugged. Tony didn’t even try to hide his excitement at the thought of Lydia tied up as he left the room.


	8. In which Lydia is working it

For the next two weeks, Bruce and Nelle worked long days together, and also became friends outside of work. They often ate meals together, sometimes took breaks and just chatted, and enjoyed each other’s company quite a bit. 

During that fortnight, Lydia and Loki often exchanged banter, but pretty much left each other alone otherwise. Neither of them minded the other one being there; in fact, they both secretly quite enjoyed each other’s company. Clint often came into the room and during these times, he and Lydia flirted up a storm. He knew she was a dangerous criminal, but he was incredibly attracted to her and didn’t often get that kind of attention from women, at least that he noticed. 

Lydia was an expert at seduction and persuasion and was hoping that she could get him to let her out at some point so that she could escape. Loki thought her antics were ridiculous and futile, but to his dismay, Clint seemed to be spending more and more time in the room and seemed to be warming up to Lydia every day. 

Lydia herself knew that it was only a matter of time before Clint caved.


	9. In which Nelle feels appreciated

Bruce glanced at the French scientific essay again. After looking at so many of Nelle’s translations, he had picked up a few words, but he wanted to make sure to double-check with her when he thought he had figured something out. 

“Nelle, could you translate this paragraph for me?” 

Nelle read over the paragraph a couple of times. 

“It’s talking about some kind of strong but compact power source…the most accurate translation is ‘energy cube.’” 

“Wow. Do you know what this means?” 

“Um…no?” Nelle admitted.

“What I’m working on, what I’m trying to find is called the Tesseract, and it’s basically a cube of energy. I’m trying to locate it by tracing the gamma rays. What this means is that Bernard Chastain worked with the Tesseract.” 

“So, that’ll make your job easier, right? Maybe he says somewhere how to trace the radiation.” 

“Exactly. This is just what I needed; you’re amazing.” 

“I didn’t do anything, I just translated what you asked me to.” 

“If you weren’t here, I wouldn’t have known that. You just made my job a lot easier.” Nelle smiled hugely and looked away shyly. “What?” 

“It’s just…it’s nice to feel appreciated for something so small,” she said, blushing. Bruce walked over to her and put a hand on her shoulder.

“Nelle, if this helps me find the Tesseract…you could have just saved the entire planet,” he informed her. 

“Wow. Who knew?” 

“Do you think you could look for any other mentions of the Tesseract?” 

“I’m on it,” Nelle said, flipping through papers and books of Chastain’s work. She felt a sudden urge not to let Bruce down when he put so much value on her help.


	10. In which Clint gets some

Clint sighed in frustration as he fiddled with the new weapon Stark Industries had created. Tony had dropped it off for him in parts and hadn’t left an instruction manual, so now Clint was forced trying to put it together himself without hurting himself with it in the process. 

“That doesn’t go there,” Lydia said, watching him through the glass. 

“How would you know?” he groaned. 

“I know weapons,” she said confidently. “I could have that thing operational in about twenty minutes.” 

“Walk me through it,” Clint demanded, getting quite fed up with this weapon assembly task. 

“Nah. Don’t think I will.” 

“What do you want?” he asked, knowing he would probably regret asking. 

“I want out,” she said. 

“Yeah, that’s not going to happen,” Clint said. 

“Fine. Then you can figure it out by yourself,” Lydia shrugged, sitting on the bench in her prison. Clint rolled his eyes and went back to futzing with his weapon for about five minutes before groaning in annoyance again. 

“Alright. I’ll let you out. You’ll put this weapon together, and then you’re going right back in there.” 

“Whatever you say,” Lydia said with a wicked smile. Loki stared in disbelief as Clint let Lydia out. True to her word, she examined the parts of the weapon, snapping a few into place. She picked up another one and held it where it was supposed to go, but then stopped. “Well, here’s part of your problem. You need a wrench to put this on.” 

“I have a tool box in my room,” Clint said. He glanced at the glass prison, then looked at Lydia, then looked at the door out of the room. He wanted to go to his room and grab the tool box, but he didn’t want to leave Lydia alone when she was out. He sighed and pulled out a pair of handcuffs, snapping them on her wrists. “Come with me.” 

“Where are we going?” 

“We’re going to go get my toolbox and then I’ll bring you back here and uncuff you so you can finish. I’m not leaving you alone here.” 

Clint led her to his room where he went to go look for his toolbox. As soon as they were inside, Lydia kicked the door closed. Clint turned around to see what she was up to when she walked up to him, put her cuffed hands over his head so that her arms were wrapped around his neck, and pulled his head to hers, kissing him eagerly. He kissed back instinctively for a few moments, wrapping his arms around her waist, when he suddenly realized what was going on and broke the kiss. He stared down at her for a moment. 

“Dammit, you’re not going to…oh, what the hell,” he said, and brought his mouth back down to hers. She walked them over to his bed and collapsed back onto it, pulling him down on top of her as they kissed. She released his lips and began kissing along his jaw, occasionally sucking and biting on the skin. Then she worked her lips down his neck, pausing at his collarbone when she got to his vest. He hastily undid it and slipped it off, and she brought her hands back over his head so that her cuffed hands could run up and down his bare chest while she nibbled on his collarbone, making him sigh. 

His hands moved to immediately start unlacing her corset, pulling at the strings as quickly as he could, but it was still slow work. As he did this, he started kissing her neck, working his way across from her throat to her ear, sucking her earlobe into his mouth and running his teeth along it, drawing a moan from her. He finally got the corset undone and tossed it aside, kissing her sternum. As he kissed lower, he reached up and grabbed her wrists, attaching the handcuffs to the headboard. 

As they continued kissing each other’s necks and chests, Clint reached down to remove his pants and then hers, underwear coming off in the process. It wasn’t long after this that both of them received some long-awaited pleasure. 

When they were finished, Clint collapsed next to her, completely exhausted. He only closed his eyes for a minute, figuring that he could get up in a moment and then finish the weapon assembly, but he quickly fell asleep. Once he was snoring, Lydia used her skill to loosen the handcuffs a bit and slip her wrists out of them quietly, leaving them attached to the bed. She carefully got off the bed and grabbed her clothes, putting on her pants and then quickly lacing up her corset. 

Once she was dressed, she quietly slipped out of the room. Not knowing her way around, she figured she’d return to the room she shared with Loki and then backtrack from there based on how she was led onto the helicarrier. When she got there, Loki looked up in surprise, walking over to the glass to stare at her. While she was there, she couldn’t help but gloat a bit. 

“I seem to remember you saying that my flirting was pointless. It’s funny how I’m out here and you’re in there…not to mention the fact that I just rocked Clint Barton’s world. Well, it’s been real, but I have places to be. Look me up if you ever get out of there,” she said. As soon as she was finished with this smug speech, Loki started laughing quite hard, his eyes glowing green with mirth. “What are you laughing at? You’re stuck in a hamster tank and I’m off scott free.” 

“He’s laughing because he can see what’s behind you,” a voice said, and Lydia turned around to see Agent Coulson standing sternly behind her. 

“Oh, shit,” Lydia said. Coulson put her back into her cell, and she sat down on the bench, pouting. Loki was still laughing hysterically. “Oh, shut up.” 

“We here at S.H.I.E.L.D. are not as stupid as you seem to think, Ms. Sorenson,” Coulson said. 

“Barton is. He’s the one who let me out.” 

“An oversight for which he will be disciplined immediately,” Coulson said darkly. “I hope you enjoyed your little excursion…it’ll be the last time you’re out of there for a very long time.” With that, he left the room, leaving Lydia scowling and Loki laughing.


	11. In which Bruce and Nelle have a moment

Bruce and Nelle worked fairly late and she had been poring over Chastain’s essays for hours. 

“Bruce, come look at this,” she finally said after turning a page. Bruce stood behind her, leaning over her shoulder to look at the page she had open. There was a diagram of the Tesseract and an explanation about how it can be used to power a variety of devices. “He says the potential of the Tesseract is still largely undiscovered. Historically, it’s been known to power weapons, open portals, and show the future, but that there is still a lot it can do that is yet unknown.” 

While she was saying this, Bruce had suddenly realized how close his face was to hers and he could smell her hair. Nelle turned her head to see what he thought of this information, but he was just staring at her. She involuntarily glanced at his lips, then at the same time they seemed to remember that they were working. 

“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” Bruce asked. Nelle explained what the page said and they discussed the implications of the information, but both of their minds were on the moment they’d just shared, although they both thought that they must have imagined it.


	12. In which Loki is hotter than Thor

Loki was pacing around his cell, finding way too much enjoyment in taunting Lydia for getting so cocky about her near-escape. He didn’t say much, just looked at her and occasionally smirked. 

“Can you just stop?” she asked. 

“I did not speak,” he said. 

“Stop looking at me like that.” 

“I see. You feel you have the right to revel in my failures. Yet, when the same is done to you, it eats you up inside.” 

“I’m serious. Just shut up!” Lydia yelled, then took a deep breath and blinked back the tears that were starting to form. “Just…leave me alone,” she added softly. Loki’s smug grin slowly fell, and he stepped closer to her. 

“I did not intend to cause you pain; I was simply returning the goading you seem to enjoy bestowing upon me.” Lydia glanced at him, seeing the sincerity in his green eyes. She sighed and looked away again. 

“It’s fine. It all just proves that I can’t do anything right. Everyone else laughs at me, why shouldn’t you?” 

“I do not understand,” he said, taken aback by this new vulnerable side of her, since she usually seemed much more self-assured. 

“Yeah, well, no one does. Not that many people are a huge disappointment to their family.” 

“Your parents...do not acknowledge your success?” he asked, suddenly filling up with sympathy. Lydia didn’t have to say anything – he already knew the answer. “I know the feeling well.” 

“Really?” Lydia asked, surprised. 

“Let’s just say that it’s difficult for my parents to see me while I’m hiding in their son’s shadow.” 

“Your brother’s the favorite, huh? I know what that’s like. My sister can do no wrong.”

“I have no true family. I was adopted…or rather, stolen from my homeland for political gain.” 

“I’m adopted too. My sister and I both are, although it’s like she was made for my parents. I’m kind of the odd one out,” Lydia said. She glanced at Loki, seeing that he was nearly in tears himself listening to her experiences. “You’re really not making any of that up? About being adopted and feeling like a disappointment?” 

“Not a word of it,” he said seriously. 

“You’re the first person I’ve ever met who has any idea how I feel,” she said. 

“I understand from personal experience, although I find it difficult to imagine anyone having a beautiful and inventive daughter, yet not appreciating her.” 

“I’m not so inventive. I got caught.” 

“Yet you escaped in the first place, did you not?” 

“I guess that’s true. Also, your flattery is sweet, but you don’t have to do that.” 

“Do what?” 

“Call me beautiful.” 

“I spoke the truth.” Lydia didn’t know how to respond to this, so she just turned her head away so that he wouldn’t see her smile. 

“Well, if it helps, I think your parents should be proud of you as well, no matter what your brother’s ever done.” As she said this, someone she hadn’t yet seen entered the room – a tall, muscular man with longish golden hair. 

“Speak of the devil,” Loki said darkly. 

“That’s him?” Lydia asked. 

“Yes. The future king of Asgard, in all his perfection,” he replied sarcastically. He turned away, waiting to hear Lydia flirt with him, but she didn’t. 

“He’s strong and handsome, but he’s not perfect,” she said. Loki grinned slightly. “Besides, you can probably tell me about all his weird habits, and then he won’t seem so pretty.” 

“Actually…” Loki said, and they began chatting about their siblings’ weird quirks, laughing over them and enjoying the fact that they finally had someone to talk to who understood how they felt.


	13. In which Nelle meets the other guy

For a few days, Nelle and Bruce worked primarily on trying to find everything Chastain had to say about the Tesseract. They still hadn’t found much information on locating it by tracking gamma rays, but they felt like they were close to discovering something they could work with. 

“Ugh. I’ve been looking at words too long, I’m starting to go loopy. Do you mind if we take a break?” Nelle asked. 

“Not at all. I think that’s a good idea.” Nelle stood up and stretched, standing next to Bruce. “Nelle, I actually wanted to ask you something…” Bruce started, and she turned to look at him. He looked nervous. “I was thinking…if you want to…I’d like to take you to dinner after work,” he stammered. 

Nelle smiled and was about to answer when there was some kind of bump on the helicarrier. It threw Nelle into Bruce’s chest, and he put his hands on her arms to steady her. She looked up into his face which was a few inches from hers, and they glanced at each other’s mouths for a moment. Bruce leaned his head down a bit, but before his lips could touch hers, there was a big explosion in one of the engines and Bruce and Nelle fell through the floor, hitting the floor below. Nelle had hit her cheekbone, and was a little bruised, but otherwise alright. 

“Bruce, are you okay?” she asked, looking over to where he was lying face down. “Bruce?” He was trembling, his hands balling into fists. Nelle scrambled up and put her hand on his back. “Bruce, are you alright?” 

“Get away from me,” he said, shoving her away. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“Get away,” he said, his voice now a deep rumble that sounded nothing like his normal voice. His skin was turning a greenish tint and his clothes were tearing. 

“Bruce, what’s happening to you?” 

“I SAID GET AWAY!” he growled as muscles began to bulge through the fabric of his shirt as he screamed in pain. A moment later, a large green monster-like man was stumbling around. Nelle gasped, then immediately turned around and ran. 

The next couple of hours were chaos as The Hulk tore through the helicarrier and the other Avengers fought him. Clint finally managed to shoot him with an arrow that knocked him unconscious, and they stored him away somewhere where he could sleep it off until he turned back into Bruce.


	14. In which Loki's plan works, then fails

Meanwhile, in the glass cell, Loki and Lydia had also felt the bump on the helicarrier. They immediately looked at each other and said in unison,

“What did you do?” 

The engine exploded and there was a lot of shouting and running around, and then they heard the first roar of The Hulk. A smile spread over Loki’s face. 

“This was you, huh? How did you do it? I guess you must have accomplices. What’s the plan?” 

“My plan is for the monster to destroy The Avengers. Then, I will get my army to help me rule this realm.” 

“So far, it’s going pretty well,” Lydia said, genuinely impressed. “Well done…although frankly I’m not so sure I want you ruling over me.” 

“I will convince you to kneel before me,” he said. 

“Call me old-fashioned, but men used to buy a woman dinner before asking her to kneel,” Lydia retorted with a wink. 

“Is a meal all that is required for your submission?” 

“Well, I have to actually like you, too,” she said. “A girl’s got to have some standards.” 

When the chaos had died down a bit, Loki was dismayed. The Hulk hadn’t harmed anyone, although significant damage was done to the helicarrier. However, Tony Stark and Captain America had fixed the engine and everything went back to relatively normal. 

“Perhaps The Avengers are more formidable than I realized,” he said dejectedly. 

“No…hey, I’ll bet they’re falling apart. Some of them never got along in the first place, maybe this divided them even further.” 

“Perhaps,” he said, although he didn’t sound convinced. 

“They still don’t know where the Tesseract is. That’s something.” 

“That is true. I still have the advantage,” he said with a wicked smile. 

“There you go. It’s good to see you looking like yourself again,” Lydia teased. She and Loki exchanged a smile.


	15. In which Nelle has a lot to take in

Nelle was incredibly nervous to go to Bruce’s lab the next day. Although the place was in a bit of disarray and there was a big hole in the floor, Bruce looked pretty normal when she got there. 

“Hey,” she said shyly. 

“Hi. Did I hurt you at all yesterday?” 

“No…no, I’m fine, just bruised from the explosion,” she said awkwardly. 

“I was going to tell you…” he started.

“It would have been nice to know. What…happened to you?” 

Bruce took a deep breath and explained everything. How he had gotten shot with an extra-large dose of gamma radiation, how he had become The Hulk, and what he had been doing since that happened. When he was finished, he gave her a minute to process this information, then continued. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I want you to know that I have it under control.” 

“It seemed pretty out of control yesterday.” 

“That was an anomaly.” 

“Well, how do I know that it won’t happen again? If I hadn’t run away when I did...it’s a lot to take in, Bruce.” 

“I know. But I promise you, it’s under control.” Nelle smiled and nodded, putting a hand on his arm. He couldn’t help but ask. He had to know. “Yesterday, I asked you something right before it all happened.” 

“I was going to say yes,” she told him softly. 

“Past tense,” he acknowledged, nodding understandingly. 

“I’m sorry, Bruce. I just…I don’t know how I’m supposed to handle this. It’s not exactly something a girl imagines herself dealing with.” 

“If you don’t want to work with me anymore, I’m sure they can get someone else to do it.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I want to keep working with you. Maybe we should keep looking for how to stop this Tesseract.” 

“You’re right. Let’s keep looking,” Bruce said, but his mind was heavy knowing that he had messed up his chance with Nelle.


	16. In which Loki and Lydia switch bodies

Lydia and Loki were often pretty bored in the cell. They spent a lot of time telling stories and chatting. 

“Barton hasn’t come to visit me since that one night. It’s a shame. I kind of miss him.” 

“Don’t tell me you fell for that simpleton,” Loki said scornfully. 

“No…but he was fun to flirt with, and he let me out. Plus, he was pretty good in bed.” Loki attempted to hide his jealousy at this. 

“I’m sure you can seduce some other poor fool.” 

“Are you judging my methods?” Lydia asked. 

“It is easy to seduce someone as an attractive woman.” 

“No, it isn’t. It’s a learned skill. I bet I could do it if I looked like you, but you couldn’t even if you were a hot girl.” Loki laughed at this. 

“Shall we find out?” With this, he waved his hand and suddenly Lydia was staring at herself. Loki had taken on the form of her – her body, her clothes, her voice. “My name is Lydia. I think I have mastered the art of seduction, but I really just pushed up my breasts with this corset.” 

“Hey!” Lydia said. Loki waved his hand again and then smiled with Lydia’s face. Lydia looked down and saw that she was wearing Loki’s armor. She glanced at her reflection in the glass and realized that she looked exactly like Loki. 

“I am Loki of Asgard. Kneel before me, peasants!” 

“I would not say ‘peasants,’” Loki retorted. 

“I think ‘mortal’ is an insult,” Lydia continued. At that moment, Captain America came in wearing his uniform. Lydia glanced at Loki, disguised as her, and nodded at him, prompting him to put their challenge to the test. 

“Hi, big boy. Your muscles are soooo big. I wish I could touch them. You make me feel so noble and patriotic. I want to hug small children and sew some stars on a flag.” 

“I’m…glad I could inspire you, ma’am,” the captain said, not knowing how to handle this. He awkwardly left the room.

“Nailed it,” Lydia said sarcastically, laughing through Loki’s mouth. “You decided to try Captain Red White and Butt instead of, oh, I don’t know, the guy I already had sex with?” 

“Let us see if you do any better taking on my form,” Loki said, nodding to Natasha Romanoff, who was entering the room. Lydia took on this challenge, turning to Loki just as Natasha was in hearing range. 

“I do not know why Barton would lie about such a thing,” she said as Loki, pretending to be mid-conversation. Natasha stopped in her tracks and turned toward the glass. 

“What did Barton lie about?” 

“It doesn’t matter.” 

“Tell me, Loki.” 

“Shall I tell her?” Lydia said to Loki, then turned back to Natasha. “He said you were…shall I say…unsatisfying in the bedroom.” 

“Excuse me?” Natasha asked, her shoulders tensing up. 

“I am only repeating what I heard from him.” 

“Yeah, well, I’m sure you’d like to test that, but I can assure you that I’m spectacular in bed. Not that you’ll ever know.” 

“Do not flatter yourself, you mewling quim. I would not bed you even if you begged me,” Lydia hissed. Loki was actually kind of impressed with her imitation of him. 

“Yes. Well. We’ll see about that,” Natasha said crisply, leaving the room. Once she was gone, Lydia turned to Loki as he changed them back to their original forms. 

“That, my dear Loki, is how it’s done,” Lydia said with a smile. Loki smirked a bit at the affectionate address, but he was not to be defeated. 

“Yes, that is very well done. However, I doubt you would be as successful using your tactics on me.” 

“Oh, don’t be so sure,” she said, walking closer to him. “It’s only a matter of time before I have you all wrapped up around my finger. Sooner or later, one of us might just kneel…it’ll be interesting to see which one it is,” she whispered about an inch away from his face, staring into his green eyes. With that, she turned on her heels and went to the other side of the cell, leaving Loki completely enamored with her.


	17. In which Tony is a good bro

Bruce and Nelle were working together every day, but things were definitely uncomfortable between them. They were overly professional, only discussing what they were working on, and they avoided eye contact a lot. Bruce kept going through his head how he could have handled things better…he should have told her sooner, or kept a better grip on the Other Guy…maybe then she would want him. Meanwhile, Nelle kept trying to figure out what to say to him, but nothing seemed right. 

One day, Tony came into the lab and immediately noticed the strange vibe. 

“Who died?” he asked. They both just sort of glanced at him awkwardly. “Wait, did someone actually die?” 

“No one’s dead, Tony,” Bruce finally said. 

“How’s that research going, on the French kissing?” Tony began again. “Have you tested all the variables? There are a lot of them.” 

“Tony,” Bruce said impatiently. Nelle was just blushing furiously. 

“You mean you haven’t even started it? You guys are letting me down. This is vital research that needs to be done immediately, and I can think of no one who would be better at experimenting on this subject than the two of you. I mean that,” Tony replied. 

“This is really not a good time,” Bruce said. Tony glanced at the flushed Nelle, then back at Bruce, who was clearly uncomfortable. 

“Dr. Banner, can I speak with you outside for a moment?” Tony said. Bruce glanced apologetically at Nelle and followed Tony outside the lab. “What’s going on with you two?” Tony demanded when they were outside the door. “I set that up perfectly. I thought you were going to ask her out.” 

“I did…but she met the Other Guy before she could answer. She got scared. Anyone would.” 

“The big green guy comes out, what, once a decade?” 

“I tried to explain that.” 

“Then tell me this: if she doesn’t want to be with you because she saw you transform into a huge green giant of wrath, then how come when I was in there, she looked like she wanted to jump on you and rip off all your clothes? What that says to me is that she’s either into some pretty kinky stuff – which, I don’t judge – or she’s completely crazy about you.” 

“She doesn’t believe that I have it under control…and to be honest, I’m not so sure I do anymore either. And don’t say anything to her, just leave it alone,” Bruce said, reading Tony’s mind. “I have to get back to work,” he added, going back into the lab. 

“Yeah, I didn’t promise anything,” Tony said to himself, choosing to ignore Bruce’s request to keep quiet about this. There was no way he was going to let his friend sit there and let the girl of his dreams drift away.


	18. In which Loki and Lydia are adorable

“I don’t believe you,” Lydia said, laughing. 

“I would not lie about this,” Loki said. 

“There is no way you can dance.” 

“I have been attending the royal ball in Asgard since my childhood. I learned how to dance at a young age.” 

“Prove it,” Lydia said snarkily. 

“As you wish,” Loki said, waving his hand. Lydia looked down to find herself wearing a flowy, floor-length emerald dress with a v-neck. The top half of the dress was embellished with black beaded designs. “Yes, that suits you,” he said in approval, then offered her his hand. She blushed under his admiring gaze, took his hand, and he pulled her close to him and began expertly leading her into something similar to but not exactly like a waltz – she assumed it was an Asgardian dance. 

As soon as they had begun, Nick Fury walked in. He took one look at what was going on in the glass cell. He didn’t know how or when Lydia had changed clothes, or why they were dancing.

“I do not get paid enough for this,” he said to himself. “There are just some things I don’t want to know about.” With that, he left the room again. 

“Alright, I believe you. You can dance,” Lydia told him. 

“You, however, just stepped on my foot,” Loki replied. 

“I did not.” 

“I suppose my foot began hurting of its own accord?” 

“Well, fine, maybe I stepped on your foot, but you’re the one who’s leading. You put your foot under mine.” 

“Yes, I led you to step on my foot, it is a common dance step on Asgard,” he said sarcastically. 

“Well…I’m not used to wearing these thin, strappy little heels. Whatever, this was a dumb idea anyway,” she grumbled, backing away from him. 

“You cannot abide someone being better at something than you are,” Loki snapped, embarrassed that she’d said that dancing with him was a bad idea. 

“Oh, that’s rich coming from you, Mr. I Want to Rule the World,” Lydia retorted, stepping closer to him and lifting her chin in defiance. “Besides…you’re not better than me.” Loki laughed. 

“You’ve just proved my point,” he said with a wicked smile. Lydia felt like that was enough of that conversation and responded by grabbing the front of his leather armor and pulling his mouth down to hers. He kissed her back longingly, pulling her close to him as her fingers tangled in his black hair. This continued for a few minutes before Loki finally broke the kiss, stepping away from her. “I concede – your seductive skill is superior.” 

“What are you talking about?” Lydia asked, still reeling from the kiss. 

“You’ve won. Your point has been made. I said you could not seduce me, and you have. You may now bask in your victory.” 

“Loki, I have no idea what you’re talking about. That’s not what I was doing. I kissed you because I care about you.” 

“Is this true?” 

“Have you noticed that I haven’t been flirting with any of the Avengers lately?” He nodded, confused, and she looked away, not wanting to see his face while she was making vulnerable confessions. “When I first got locked in here, I wanted out, and I thought that was the way to escape. I wanted to prove that I can do something right. But after I got put back in here…I didn’t want to leave…without you. You’re the only person who’s ever understood me, as cheesy as that sounds.” She finally looked up at him. His face was expressionless, but he stepped over to her and lifted her chin so that she would look at him. 

“We will get out of here. Together,” he promised, then wrapped a hand behind her neck and kissed her meaningfully. She slid her hands up and down the front of his armor, grabbing it to pull him closer. When they finally came up for air, she smiled at him. 

“Can I have my clothes back now?” she asked. Loki waved his hand and she looked down to see herself back into her regular clothes, except her corset was green instead of red. “Seriously?” she asked, smiling up at him. 

“My color suits you well,” he said. 

“Your color? You don’t own the color green.” 

“Perhaps you would prefer to wear nothing at all?” he asked, lifting his hand. 

“No, this is good,” she said hastily, causing Loki to smile mischievously. She kept the green corset for the rest of the time they were locked in together.


	19. In which Tony is still a good bro

Bruce and Nelle had been working together, but outside of the lab things were incredibly uncomfortable between them. While Nelle was eating lunch in the helicarrier’s cafeteria, Tony happened to see her and knew that he should take the opportunity to speak with her while she was alone. 

“How’s it going, French Toast?” he greeted, sitting down across from her. 

“Oh, hi, Tony.” 

“There’s something I want to talk to you about, and before I start, I want you to know that Bruce specifically told me not to say any of this.” 

“Does this have anything to do with French kissing?” she asked, a bit hesitantly.

“Yes and no. Listen, I know what you saw. We call him The Hulk. The thing is, you weren’t supposed to see him. Trust me, I’ve been trying for weeks to get Bruce to let out his angry green side. Mostly to see how well he had a handle on it. I can assure you: what you saw was a fluke.” 

“Why are you telling me this?” she asked, a bit confused as to why this conversation was happening.

“I’m trying to protect my friend from getting his heart broken. He’s been afraid to get close to anyone for years. He hid himself away in Brazil, Pakistan, Calcutta. And now, he finally opens up to someone, and then this happens. I’m not blaming you for that – the whole incident was a case of stunningly horrific timing.” 

“Yeah, but…he should have told me.” 

“You’re right. Sometime while you two had your heads bent over a book, your faces only inches apart, he should have said, ‘oh, by the way, sometimes when disaster strikes, I turn into a ten-foot-tall green monster that likes to smash things…is that going to be a problem?’” 

“I suppose that’s not an easy thing to casually bring up.” 

“Are you afraid he’ll hurt you?” 

“Well…not necessarily…”

“A few months ago, Bruce accidentally stepped on a grasshopper and he was sad about it for a week. If he gets that upset over killing a bug, imagine how bad he’d feel if he ever did anything to you.” Nelle didn’t really have an answer to this – he had given her a lot of things to think about that hadn’t occurred to her before – so she just sat there silently. “Think it over.” With that, he was gone.


	20. In which Cap is oblivious

Captain America walked into the room where the prisoners were being held and was surprised at what he found. Lydia’s corset had changed from a red one to a green one – where had she gotten the green one? – and her hair was disheveled. Loki’s bottom lip was bleeding and his hair was also a bit of a mess. 

“Have you two been fighting?” the captain asked. 

“There has been a bit of a…tussle,” Lydia said, smiling rather smugly. Loki also got a wicked grin on his face. 

“If it had been me, I would have separated you two, but it wasn’t my call,” Cap said before leaving. When he found the other Avengers at a meeting, he reported to Fury what he’d seen when he checked on them. “I think they were fighting in there. They looked a bit roughed up and Loki’s lip was bleeding – they both looked pretty satisfied with themselves.” Clint and Natasha   
exchanged a look, Maria Hill rolled her eyes, Bruce and Nick Fury looked uncomfortable, Thor looked confused, and Tony looked impressed. “Am I missing something?” Cap asked when he saw all of these expressions. 

“It’s okay, Betsy Ross. Even late bloomers go through puberty eventually,” Tony said. Everyone seemed to know what was going on except Cap…and maybe Thor.


	21. In which Bruce is adorable

Nelle and Bruce were working together the next day. Nelle had thought over what Tony had said, and really wanted to give Bruce a chance, but there hadn’t been a good time to bring anything up. Ever since that engine explosion, finding the Tesseract seemed more important than ever. 

“Is this everything he wrote, or is there more?” Nelle asked.

“There’s more, but some of them are a little tricky to find,” Bruce replied, removing his glasses to rub his eyes. Nelle typed a bit on her laptop and then stood up to stretch. 

“It looks like some of his books are at the Science, Industry, and Business Library in New York. I bet we could take one of the quinjets there. It’s important that we do everything we can to find this stupid cube,” Nelle said. 

“Let’s go,” Bruce replied, glad to be doing something besides staring at screens and pages for a bit. 

Soon, they were in a quinjet on their way to New York to check out this library. Finally, they arrived and entered the massive library. They grabbed a map and then took off in the direction where they would find Chastain’s works. Before they could make it to the right aisle, there was an explosion in the library. A cascade of rocks fell, trapping Bruce and Nelle into one section of the library. Bruce was completely unharmed, but a rock had landed on Nelle’s head, knocking her unconscious. They seemed to be the only two trapped in that area. 

“Nelle? Nelle, are you alright?” Bruce asked. “Hello?! Can somebody help me?” he shouted several times, but no one answered. They were barricaded in and no one was trapped with them. He gave Nelle a quick examination and determined that she’d be out for a while, but would otherwise be fine save a small cut on her forehead that would probably bruise a little. He scooped her up and found a small couch between a couple shelves. He laid her on it and then went back to the rocks, grabbing at them and pulling them aside until his hands were sore. There was no way he was digging them out all in one sitting. He took a better look around – there were no doors, no windows, no openings of any kind. They were trapped, and that was all there was to it. He briefly thought about letting the Other Guy take a crack at it, but there was no way he was going to risk that with Nelle around. 

Dejected, he returned to the couch where he’d left Nelle, grabbed a book, and waited until she woke up. He checked his phone – no reception - and then found Nelle’s in her purse with the same luck. There was no way out unless Nelle thought of something. 

Nelle woke up about half an hour later, sitting up slowly and rubbing her sore head. She looked over at Bruce, who shot out of his chair and went to sit next to her on the couch, steadying her and rubbing her back gently. 

“Are you alright?” 

“Yeah, I’m fine. We sure do get stuck in explosions a lot, don’t we?” 

“Nelle, some debris fell and trapped us in here. I tried to dig us out, but there’s just too much.” Nelle thought for a few minutes, standing up and pacing back and forth to walk off her headache. She shouted a few times, but there was no answer, only an echo. She walked over to the big rock pile that was locking them in and sighed – Bruce was right – there was too much for them to dig their way out with their bare hands. Finally, she went back over to the couch and sat down on it, sighing. 

“Bruce…I’m scared,” Nelle said, slightly embarrassed. 

“The Other Guy isn’t coming out,” he assured her. 

“No, I’m not scared of you. It’s just…what if we never get out of here?” 

“We’ll get out, I promise. Right now, I think we should get some rest. We’ll be able to think better if we don’t panic.” 

“What if you—”

“No. I’m not going to change around you. I can’t risk hurting you,” Bruce said earnestly, looking down into his lap. Nelle couldn’t help herself – she scooted closer to him on the couch and rested her head on his shoulder. He instinctively put his arm around her and she snuggled more comfortably into his shoulder. They just sat like this in silence for a few minutes before Nelle finally spoke. 

“Bruce? Is it true that you stepped on a grasshopper and then mourned its death for a week?” 

“You’ve been talking to Tony, haven’t you?” 

“Yeah. He said you told him not to.” 

“I should have known he wouldn’t listen,” Bruce said. He paused for a moment, then answered, “It was a month. I just stopped talking about it after a week.” Nelle couldn’t help but smile at this. “What else did Tony say?” 

“That you’d never hurt me.” 

“Not intentionally.” 

“I know that. I’m sorry I reacted the way I did.” 

“I should have told you.” 

“Maybe, but it’s not an easy thing to mention. And anyway, there are a few days a month when I’m not so pretty either.” 

“I’ve known you for a month and you’re always pretty.” Nelle smiled and blushed, then sat up a bit, staring at Bruce for a few moments. Then, she put her hand on the side of his face and leaned closer, but he grabbed her hand, bringing it down and backing away slightly. “Nelle, I want you to kiss me more than anything…but I don’t want it to be because you’re scared and I’m comforting you.” 

“Bruce, I haven’t stopped wanting to kiss you since the first day I met you,” Nelle confessed. “But if it’s not the right time, that’s okay—” she was stopped by Bruce’s lips coming down on hers. They kissed languidly for a long time, his hands tangling in her hair while hers ran between his chest and arms. Finally, they stopped for air and she snuggled back into his side. “By the way…remember when you asked me to dinner? And I was going to say yes, but then I didn’t? If the question is still out there, the answer is back to yes.” 

“I’ll take you somewhere nice tomorrow night,” Bruce assured her. 

“If we’re out by then,” Nelle said sadly. 

“We will be. I have something to look forward to. I’ll make sure it happens.” Nelle smiled and tilted her head up to give him another quick kiss. “I think we should try to get some sleep. If we’re well-rested, we’ll be able to come up with a plan tomorrow morning.” 

“Okay,” Nelle agreed. They adjusted themselves until they were spooning on the couch. Bruce placed a kiss into her hair, and soon they were fast asleep.


	22. In which Lydia is in love

Loki and Lydia had formed a relationship of sorts, although nothing of that nature had been actually discussed. They both understood that it was more between them than something purely physical, although there was much physical interaction. 

One morning, Thor appeared in the room, his large, sinewy form standing just outside the glass cell. Loki’s jaw clenched as he walked over to his brother. 

“Brother, I do not understand why you have done this,” Thor began. “When I arrived in Midgard, my hope was that you would return to Asgard with me and join our family once more.” 

“I have no family,” Loki hissed. “They rejected me. You all did.” 

“Your actions have brought shame upon you. I gave you a chance to come home. You chose to be imprisoned here alone instead of being in Asgard with those who love you.” 

“He’s not alone,” Lydia said, lifting her chin and walking over to the glass. 

“Stay out of this!” Thor roared at her. 

“Do not speak to her that way!” Loki shouted back, pounding a fist against the glass, angry tears welling up in his eyes. Thor looked taken aback and sighed. 

“I hope that someday, you will stop this hate and murder and return to Asgard as my brother once more,” he said sadly, then left the room. As soon as he was gone, Loki let his tears flow more freely. Lydia gave him a minute, then walked up behind him and put her hand on his shoulder.

“When he said you’re not with people who love you…that’s not true,” she said softly. Loki gasped and turned around, his pale face streaked with tears. She put her hands on his face and brought it down to hers, kissing him deeply, lovingly, fingers threading into his silky hair. They continued kissing for hours, Lydia comforting him and showing him how much he mattered to her.


	23. In which Tony has his bro's back

Bruce and Nelle woke up the next day and remembered where they were. They sat up and stretched, taking in their surroundings. Nelle hastily attempted to comb through her hair with her fingers, hoping she didn’t look too crazy. 

“I told you I’m scary before I’ve had caffeine,” she joked. 

“I’m not scared,” Bruce said with a small smile. She smiled back and leaned forward to kiss him before standing up. 

“Alright, we need to figure out how to get out of here. I have a date tonight,” she said. They re-examined their situation and began pulling debris out of the way, but it just seemed like the pile of rubble never ended. After a couple hours of this, they needed a break and collapsed back on the couch. “This seems hopeless,” she said. “Unless…” 

“Unless what?” 

“Bruce…I can’t think of any other way to get out of here except…you know…him.” 

“You know I can’t do that,” Bruce said. 

“Yes you can. Look, you’re not going to hurt me. I know it. There’s no other way – our cell phones don’t work, we have no tools, there’s an endless pile of demolished library trapping us in. He’s the only one who can get us out of here.” 

“Stay down, don’t let him see you, and stay out of his way,” Bruce sighed, realizing that she was right. She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him soundly to assure him that everything would be okay. While they were still kissing, they suddenly heard a blast. It took a moment for both of their brains to register it, but when they did, they stopped kissing and turned to see Iron Man landing next to them. They also noticed a massive hole he’d blasted into the wall of the library that was letting in sunlight.

“Tony? How did you find us?” Bruce asked. 

“No one from S.H.I.E.L.D. had heard from you all night, so I traced your phone,” Tony said through his Iron Man helmet. 

“You’re brilliant!” Nelle said, going over and giving his metal head a kiss on the cheek. 

“I was going to lock you two in a room until you got together, but it looks like someone already beat me to it,” Tony replied. “Apparently some nutjob didn’t like this library’s selection, and decided a strongly-worded letter wouldn’t get his point across vehemently enough.” 

“Let’s get out of here,” Nelle said excitedly, jumping through the hole Tony had made in the wall. Bruce followed, pausing for a moment to turn to Tony. 

“We have a date tonight,” Bruce said. 

“Where are you taking her?” 

“I don’t know yet. Do you know of a good place?” 

“Leave everything up to me. I’ll make all the arrangements, you two just show up at the tower at 7:00 sharp.” 

“You really don’t have to do that…” Bruce started. 

“I insist.” Bruce knew there was no arguing when Tony had set his mind to something. 

“Thanks, Tony. I owe you. I guess I’d better get going.” The two men jumped out of the hole in the wall and went on their way.


	24. In which Coulson promotes safe sex

When Agent Coulson entered to check on the prisoners, he was surprised to find that Lydia’s back was pressed against the glass and Loki’s hand was flat against the wall next to her head, his other hand wrapped around her neck as they kissed quite intensely. His surprise did not show on his face, but Coulson, who was trained to expect everything, was not expecting that. He cleared his throat loudly. 

When the two prisoners did not stop their passionate make-out session, which was starting to get rather handsy, he cleared his throat again, even louder this time, until they finally stopped kissing and looked at him impatiently. 

“Is everything alright in here?” he asked. 

“Does it look like we need anything?” Lydia asked. 

“Perhaps a condom?” he replied, completely deadpan. 

“Nah. We’ve got it covered,” Lydia said. Coulson didn’t want to know the details of this. He pretended not to notice the small noise Lydia made when Loki suddenly bit down on her earlobe. 

“You might want to leave unless you’re into watching,” she added. “And you might not want to let anyone in here for a while.” 

Coulson left silently, thinking that at least they weren’t causing any trouble. Once he was gone, Lydia’s mouth moved to Loki’s neck, sucking a deep mark into the side, then biting down on it while grabbing fistfuls of his hair and giving the strands a good hard tug. This caused something between a moan and a growl to escape from his throat. Lydia began removing his armor, one layer at a time while he kissed, sucked on, and bit his way down her neck and across her collarbone, occasionally leaving teeth marks in her skin. He was a bit surprised that she knew how to remove his Asgardian clothes, but it was not the time to muse upon such things. Soon, the top half of his clothes were gone and he decided to set to work making sure his companion was equally attired, removing all of her clothes with the quick wave of his hand. 

“Hey! That’s not fair,” she said, although she had trouble protesting when his hands began roaming all over her body and his tongue and teeth began exploring her chest. She quickly slid his leather pants down, discovering that Asgardians do not wear undergarments. Lydia grabbed Loki’s hips and grinded them against hers, making him purr against her sternum and prompting him to lift her up and lean her against the glass for what he had in mind.


	25. In which Tony pays for a date he's not on

Bruce and Nelle arrived at Stark Tower at 7:00 just like Tony had insisted. Nelle was wearing a dark teal dress with cap sleeves, a high neckline, and a keyhole cutout on the chest that made it modest but sexy. Bruce also looked great in black pants and a nice purple button-up shirt. 

Tony greeted them and then led them into a waiting stretch limousine, where they enjoyed a nice ride to a Southeast Asian restaurant called Spice Market where they enjoyed incredible food in a gorgeous authentic atmosphere. The exotic cuisine was not completely unfamiliar to Bruce, who had lived several places abroad, most recently India. Nelle had never had this exact style of food but was adventurous enough to enjoy it and thought it was delicious. 

When they were finished eating, they were informed that everything had already been paid for, so they left the restaurant and got back into the waiting limo. Next on the agenda was the Angel Orensanz Foundation for the Arts, where an organization called Rooftop Films had set up a big screen where they were showing indie movies. They watched a quirky, intelligent comedy in the beautiful colorfully-lit venue. When the movie was finished, it was back into the limo where they were driven back to Stark Tower. They were going to get back into the Quinjet and return to the helicarrier, but the limo driver told them that the evening was not over and led them inside. 

They were led to a beautiful room near the top of the tower where there was a fire lit and two glasses of nice champagne waiting for them. They curled up on the couch near the fire and sipped their champagne while they relaxed. 

“This is amazing. Tonight must have cost Tony a fortune,” Nelle said. 

“It must have. He talked you into giving me a chance, he saved us from the demolished library, and now he gave us this incredible night. I don’t know how I’m ever going to thank him,” Bruce said, shaking his head. Nelle got a wonderful idea and grabbed Bruce’s champagne glass from him, putting it and hers on a nearby table. 

“Well…there is that French kissing research he wanted…” Nelle said, leaning forward to kiss him slowly, her tongue making its way past her lips as he sighed into her mouth. She released his lips, allowing him to say, 

“We have to make sure to test all the variables,” before he captured her mouth again. They tested the variables for a long time, and when they stopped they sipped their champagne until it was gone. Shortly after that, they ended up falling asleep on the couch. They were awakened by Tony’s girlfriend Pepper coming in to take their champagne glasses about an hour later. 

“Sorry, we fell asleep. We should get going,” Nelle said. 

“It’s late. You two are welcome to stay here for the night. I can get you set up in a room and give you some clothes to wear,” Pepper said.

“Are you sure?” Nelle asked. 

“It’s no problem at all.” 

“Okay…thank you so much. This is the second night in a row we’ve fallen asleep on a couch.” 

“The bed will be much more comfortable,” Pepper assured them. “Feel free to ask JARVIS if you need anything.” She showed them to a guest room and disappeared to go get them some clothes to wear. She came back shortly with a tank top and pajama shorts for Nelle and a t-shirt and sweat pants of Tony’s for Bruce to wear. Nelle went into the bathroom to change while Bruce changed in the room. When they were both changed, Bruce offered to sleep on the floor, but Nelle insisted they share the bed, so they crawled in, he spooned her, and they fell back asleep.


	26. In which Loki's plans change

“Show me,” Lydia insisted. 

“No.” 

“Please?” 

“Why do you want to see it?” 

“I just want to know. My boyfriend tells me he’s a frost giant, and I get curious. I promise I won’t think it’s weird. Just show me.” 

“You will not think I am a monster?” 

“I’ve known a lot of monsters, and let me tell you, it had very little to do with their appearances. Loki, I want you to feel comfortable enough to show me every side of you. I would understand if you refuse, but…not very many people have ever trusted me like you do,” she finally said. Loki sighed, then a moment later his skin turned into a bright blue color, his skin covered in small ridges and his eyes turning red. Other than that, he looked relatively the same. Lydia stared at him for a moment, then smiled, pulling him down to kiss him. When they stopped kissing, Loki returned to his regular form and smirked at her. “I think you’re amazing,” she promised, making Loki’s heart swell with joy. This feeling was quickly edged out by concern, however, when he noticed her eyes turn from their usual hazel into a vibrant blue. 

“Lydia?” Loki asked, and a moment later she grabbed her head, shouting out in pain. “Lydia!” She fell to her knees, screaming as she clutched at her head, tears starting to pour from her eyes. She looked and sounded like she was in excruciating pain. “Somebody help me!” Loki shouted. A moment later, Nick Fury and Thor had rushed in. “Thor! The Tesseract. It’s here on the helicarrier. Eric Selvig has it. I used the Chitauri scepter to control him. You must stop it!” he shouted as he got on his knees and held the trembling Lydia in his arms. “Please, brother. It’s hurting her!” 

Thor looked taken aback by all of this, and glanced at Fury, who looked like he didn’t know what to do. 

“Do you love her, brother?” Thor asked. 

“I do.” 

“I will find the Tesseract and stop it,” Thor promised. He looked to Fury, who gave Loki a slightly suspicious look but then nodded. They left the room while Fury talked into his earpiece to the other Avengers for backup. 

“Lydia…my Lydia…I will not let anything more harm you,” he assured her, stroking her hair. He just hoped Thor stopped the cube as soon as possible.


	27. In which Iron Man and The Hulk help out

Bruce and Nelle were warm, comfortable, and snuggled up in the bed Pepper had arranged for them, when they were quite abruptly awakened by Tony bursting through the door. 

“Did you guys do it? Is that my shirt? It looks good on you,” he said while Bruce and Nelle blinked at him, disoriented from being woken up so suddenly. 

“Is there a reason I’m awake with no coffee?” Nelle grumbled, laying back down and pulling her half of the blanket back over her head. Tony looked confusedly at Bruce. 

“She’s not a morning person,” Bruce explained. 

“Well, she’s welcome to stay there, but you and I just got a call from Fury. The Tesseract is on the helicarrier.” 

“Since when?” 

“Since Loki’s girlfriend got whammied. I totally called it, by the way, that those two were getting it on. Maria ‘stick up her ass’ Hill owes me $20.” 

“I’ll change and we can go.” Tony nodded and left the room while Bruce worked on changing back into his clothes from the night before. “Nelle, Tony and I have to deal with this. Can I see you when we’re done?” At this, Nelle sat up a bit. 

“Of course you can. Be careful.” She gave him a kiss and then went back to sleep before joining Pepper for coffee and girl talk for the rest of the day, occasionally checking in on the Tesseract situation through JARVIS.


	28. In which Thor vouches for Loki

Finally, the pain stopped and Lydia’s natural eye color returned. Thor and Fury returned soon after and assured Loki that the Tesseract was in S.H.I.E.L.D.’s safe hands. Fury, however, didn’t think that meant everything was tied up in a neat little bow. 

“Alright, I’m going to assume that you didn’t activate the Tesseract on your own girlfriend and then tell us how to stop it. If that was your plan, it was a stupid-ass plan. Start talking,” Fury demanded.

“My plan was a deal with the Chitauri. In exchange for the Tesseract, they would provide me with an army with which to subjugate this realm. How the Tesseract was activated, I know not. When I saw that it was hurting Lydia, I knew it had to be stopped at any cost.” 

“You must really be something, Miss Sorenson,” Fury said to Lydia, not knowing how to handle this situation. 

“I believe the Chitauri used the Tesseract to get revenge on Loki by harming his love,” Thor said. 

“Revenge for what?” Fury asked. 

“I lost sight of the plan. They wanted to get me back on track,” Loki replied. Fury was still taking in this bizarre circumstance. 

“If only all super criminals could be stopped by getting them a girl.” 

“Sir, I believe my brother has proved himself honorable. I request that he be released.” 

“I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.” 

“He has shown that he can be trusted. His love for this maiden has given him new purpose.” After a few minutes of similar cajoling, Fury finally sighed and spoke into his earpiece.   
“Alright. Loki can be released. But he will stay on the helicarrier under our scrutiny…and our protection,” Fury agreed. 

“What about Lydia?” Loki asked. 

“She hasn’t really done much since she’s been here. How do I know she won’t release a super virus into the atmosphere?” 

“I don’t have a virus. I just wanted someone to pay attention to me,” Lydia confessed. 

“How do I know you’re not lying?” 

“I don’t know…I guess you have no reason to believe me.” 

“I will not leave without her,” Loki said. Lydia smiled at him, but disagreed. 

“No, Loki, you should go. You deserve it.” 

“Alright, I’m getting a headache. You can both come out, but you’ll wear bracelets that allow us to monitor you at all times, and you will not leave the helicarrier. One slip up and you’re back in there. Understood?” 

“Yes. Thank you.” Lydia said. Coulson came in with the bracelets and applied them to Loki’s and Lydia’s wrists, and then gave them relative freedom around the helicarrier.


	29. In which Bruce gets some

After the Tesseract was safely stored by S.H.I.E.L.D., The Avengers were a lot less busy, although Bruce decided to stay there for a bit in case something else came up in America and he was needed. Besides, he had just started a relationship with Nelle and was pretty hopeful about it. He decided to take her on an all-day date in Brooklyn, which was where Nelle lived. When he picked her up, she was wearing a light blue vintage button-up dress. He had on jeans and a gray t-shirt and looked great. 

They went to the Brooklyn Bridge Park and kicked off the day by riding the well-known Jane’s Carousel. Then they walked down the cobblestone street hand-in-hand, then stopped at Almondine Bakery where they got French pastries to munch on while they continued walking around. Eventually they decided to visit the Brooklyn Bridge Park Boathouse and took a short kayaking lesson. They finished things off by getting an early dinner at a wood-fired pizza place. 

Finally, they returned to Nelle’s apartment, where she invited him inside to watch a movie. She poured them each a glass of wine and they curled up on the couch and started watching Brigadoon. About halfway through, they got distracted by other plans in the form of kissing. It started slowly but escalated in passion until Bruce was laying halfway on top of her. He paused for a moment to look down at her. 

“You know, we’re not working together anymore,” he pointed out. 

“Sure we are. We have to do that French kissing research for Tony,” Nelle teased. This prompted him to lower his mouth to hers again, slipping his tongue past her lips. Soon hands began wandering and before long Bruce began kissing down Nelle’s neck while his hands undid a couple of buttons on her dress. Abruptly, he stopped and looked at her. 

“Is this okay?” He asked. She smiled and nodded.

“We can take this into the bedroom if you’d like.” He agreed and they went into her bedroom, where they got onto the bed and then continued kissing passionately with Nelle on top of him. Bruce continued working on her buttons until her dress was undone and he slipped it over her shoulders, kissing down her neck again. Nelle pushed her hands under his t-shirt to remove it, then began working at his pants until they were soon both in their undergarments. She began to mirror his action of kissing his neck, making his head fall back onto the pillow. 

“Nelle…I think you should know…it’s been a long time,” he informed her, his arousal making him breathe heavily. 

“For me, too,” she said against his collarbone, kissing across to his shoulder. 

“Do you think it’s safe?” he gasped. She lifted her mouth to his ear, whispering into it. 

“Are you angry or stressed or upset right now?” 

“No.” 

“Then I’m not worried.” With this, he unhooked her bra and replaced it with his hands, then slid his fingers over every inch of her torso, noting her moan of appreciation when his fingers ran over a spot on her lower spine. He continued stroking this spot while her hands explored his chest and stomach until they desperately removed their last garments and took their relationship to a new level.


	30. In which the archives are christened

Loki and Lydia spent a lot of their time on the helicarrier in the archives. They both liked to be among books, references, maps, almanacs, and records. They could read, research, and observe art without being bothered a lot in there, since S.H.I.E.L.D. only really used the archives when there was something they couldn’t find out using a computer. 

One day, Lydia found Loki in there examining a map of Asgard. She came up behind him and wrapped her arms around him from behind, moving his hair aside to kiss down his neck. 

“Homesick?” she asked against his neck. “Anything I can do to make you feel better?” 

“You’re doing it, my love,” he said, removing her clothes with magic. 

“Hey!” she said. He laughed and stood up, turning to kiss her. “Nope. You don’t get any unless you remove my clothes the hard way. It’s more fun.” 

“Alright,” Loki sighed, returning her clothes. She now let him kiss her deeply, pushing her roughly against the closest bookshelf by her hips. He bit her ear, playing with it in his mouth while he began tugging at the strings on her corset. Next he started moving his mouth down her neck, nipping at her collarbone, and moving his tongue over the top of her chest until the corset was gone. He had soon slipped her out of her leather pants and black knickers, his fingers playing over her skin as she leaned forward to tug at his hair and sink her teeth into the skin of his neck, making him purr appreciatively. 

“You’re welcome to speed up this process by getting out of your own clothes,” she sighed into his neck. He decided this was a good idea and used magic to disrobe, saving time so that they could get right down to the task at hand.


	31. In which a relationship is advanced

Bruce woke up in the morning with the naked Nelle in his arms, and he woke her up by gently kissing her shoulder. She smiled at him and gave him a quick kiss on the lips, snuggling contentedly into his chest as he kissed her forehead. 

“I can’t believe you want to be with me,” he said. “Especially after meeting the Other Guy prematurely.” 

“That was a little surprising, but I had already fallen in love with you.” 

“You had?” 

“I hope that doesn’t freak you out…I know we’ve only known each other for a couple months and only been dating for a short time.” 

“I loved you the moment you walked into my lab,” he admitted. “I hope this isn’t too soon, but I was thinking of staying in America now that S.H.I.E.L.D. needs me and I was wondering if you might want to get an apartment with me.” 

“I’d love to. You can move in here if you want, or we can find something else together.” 

“I can live here until the lease is up and then we can look for something.” 

“Perfect. We’ll get to wake up every morning just like this,” she said. “And now,” she added, kissing her way up his neck, “I think we should celebrate this decision.” With that, she rolled on top of him and they did proceed to celebrate for most of the morning.


	32. In which Loki is all tied up

After a long day of creating harmless mischief and pulling pranks on Thor and Tony, Loki and Lydia returned to the room they had been given on the helicarrier and promptly began kissing. Lydia noticed that Loki was kissing her a bit more hesitantly than usual, and she became worried enough to release his lips. 

“Loki, is something wrong?” 

“I have something to tell you,” he said. She looked confused. “I will be returning to Asgard with Thor,” he said. 

“Oh,” Lydia replied sadly. So that’s why he was acting weird. Because he was just going to up and leave her. 

“I was hoping you might return with me.” 

“You want me to come to Asgard with you?” 

“I will understand if you refuse—” he started, but she stopped him by kissing him lovingly. 

“Of course I’ll come with you. I love you and there is nothing really to keep me here.” 

“Will you be happy there?” 

“I’ll be happy wherever you are. Besides, Asgard seems pretty awesome.” 

“I am a prince there, you know. Will you be able to bow to me?” 

“Only if you bow to me too,” she said with a wink. They smiled at each other getting the same idea, and then kneeled in unison, kissing each other sweetly once they were both on their knees. With that, she got up and propped one foot up on the bed, undoing the laces of one of her boots while Loki looked at her with confusion. “Get undressed and get on the bed.” 

“Is that a command?” Loki asked. 

“No, but if you don’t you’ll never find out how I intend to use this shoelace.” Curious, Loki waved his armor away and reclined on the bed. Lydia got on the bed, straddled him, and used the shoelace to tie his wrists together and then tie them to the headboard. 

“I can free myself from these restraints,” Loki informed her. 

“Yeah, but you won’t,” she said knowingly. He was far too interested in how she was going to use this dynamic. She kissed him lustfully and passionately, her tongue exploring his mouth as her hands ran over his body. He growled when she bit his neck and tugged on his hair, his excitement growing. 

Lydia then stood up and began slowly unlacing her corset, enjoying him watching her as she undressed. She ended by slipping off her leather pants and black knickers. She then got back on top of him and grinded her hips against his while she nibbled at his collarbone. Finally, she reached up and untied his wrists with one quick pull of the string. Once he was free, he flipped them over and pinned down her wrists before using one action to both punish her and reward her for teasing him.


	33. In which Fury is 100% done

The Avengers had been called to a meeting just so that Fury could be sure they were available in case he needed them at any point, making sure everyone was on the same page. However, the meeting was difficult to focus on with Loki and Lydia’s loud sex noises echoing through the air vents all throughout the helicarrier. Maria Hill rolled her eyes and snorted with disgust. 

“Sir, this is absurd. How are we supposed to get anything done with that noise?” 

“I seem to remember you being pretty loud a couple years ago,” Tony said. Everybody stared while Maria’s cheeks turned bright red, her lips pressing together angrily. 

“This meeting is over, on account of me needing a strong drink. Agents, I’ll call you if I need you,” Fury said, rubbing his temples. “Avengers, disassemble.”


End file.
